Welcome bac...Ooooohaaaaa! It's been a whil....Oooooohaaaaa! Ok, ok, enough fun with the Dunkacino back in his "Post glory (without black actors) borderlining on crazy Pacino-still love him though cause he makes classics even if he mostly screams his lines - give me a fuckin Oscar" faze. Today I will go through the many fazes of Mr. Al Pacino's brilliant career.
I break it down into 5 fazes (in Tony Montana voice) -
1) "Glory Years AKA I'm a fuckin stud even when I play a narc, a gay dude, and a motha fuckin brother killer" (Is Gollum the modern day Freido? "It should have been mine, my precious! I'm the older hobbit, I can do things like live in a cave and shit. I'm not an idiot like Samwise Gangee claims. It was mine, mt precious.") Faze
2) "I make 1 movie every fuckin 3 years cause I'm Al MothaFuckin Pacino and if Art Carney can rob an Oscar from me then fuck you and your sister" faze
3) "Post Glory, I'm mother fuckin borderlining on crazy Pacino but you still love me cause I don't break my balls for nobody. Now give me a fuckin Oscar" Faze
4) "I've lost my fuckin mind" Faze
5) "I'm Tony Mothafuckin Montana, Say hello to my little Dunkacino, Oh wait, I've fuckin lost my mind but still every time you get away, I bring you back in" Faze
1) Al Pacino was the coolest guy anywhere, cooler then Bobby D. (who also has his "lost his fuckin mind" faze. Rocky and Bullwinkle anyone?). From 1972-1983, Al Pacino ruled Hollywood. The guy played 4, 4!!!!! iconic characters in 5 movies while making another 2 very solid films (Thank you Jeffrey Tambor) to (puss in) boot(s). Oh, what's that? Cruising? I'm sorry I think your thinking of De Niro in Stardust. Honest mistake. But it is odd that Pac(hes O'houlihan)ino did play two gay like dudes when being a gay like dude was still not cool. Unless your Pacino and you made it cool. Attica! Attica! He was soooo money. If you take cool guys from that period, Pacino murders them with his little friend that somehow ruined Beverly D'Angelo, Oh how I miss you old school (Your my boy blue) D'Angelo. From boobs in hair to Lampoon's Vacation and still keeping it strong in Summer Catch (Thank heavens that Mathew Willard made a comeback that wasn't cancelled on Showtime) but then she went full Pacino. And this was Faze 4 Pacino which is scary as fuck like 88 minutes scary as fuck. She was 80's Julianne Moore, the hotter Glen Close, the less talented Maggie Smith. John Travolta had 3 iconic roles, not 5. He also loses a point for Stayin Alive. Frank Stallone actually ruined a movie that was already ruined in his 3 minutes of screen time. If I want to watch a talentless brother have sex with a musical instrument, I have 2, the Sklar Brothers. Too Cheap? Plus in one movie he idolizes Pacino with da beard ala Serpico. De Niro had 4 iconic performances but in only 4 movies. Close(r - Natalie Portman is a goddess) but no cigar (which could be used on Portman in Closer. Too graphic?). That's it. Pacino wins. Women are less equal to men to begin with so no argument can be made for them so Dunkacino wins by knockout.
2) to be continued - very soon like sooner then they can release another horrible journey film. What will the next one be, Jour (french for day) short for journey. I've already seen two of these and the Hunger Games, and besides Brendan Fraser's hair plugs, I can honestly say The kids are not alright except when Julianne Moore shows boobs which is every movie (classic Moore). Speaking of French, love Cirque du Freak except for the kid Hutcherson. Wait, Did I just Moore it up with a sprinkle of Reed Rothchild? I did.....NEW BLOG ENTRY EVERYONE!!!!!
